Deng-Dong - Seconds Out!

WMD?

***

Fudge Actually

FREE!

With your favourite Tabloid!

***

Pryceless

Guilty, M'Lud.

But I'm asking my former wife to serve my sentence for me.

***

Who Dares Gets Jailed

This is a 19mm Glock pistol.

One of the most powerful handguns in modern warfare.

Do you:

a). Use it to kill people.

b). Stick it on the wall.

Your choice.

Do you feel lucky, punk?

***

So, Let's Regulate

And, finally, each copy of my report includes a scratch card.

First Prize:

A day's work experience with Glenn Mulcaire.

***

So, Sally Can Wait

John always said my Latin would come in handy:

A-twit, a-twot, a-twut, a-twat

I'm off Twitter and that is that.

***

link:  'Bye Bye Tweetsville

Sky's Not The Limit

I must stress that News Corporation

is an Equal Opportunities Employer:

all employees have equal opportunies for

tapping, hacking, back-tracking and sacking.

***

Come Now, Julian

A new perspective on

Wikileaks

has emerged with

Julian Assange

being accused of using a

broken condom.

***

The Leaker Leaked

Next week WikiLeaks will release

documents about XXXXX and XXXXX .

UPDATE:

An injunction has been taken out

against

borderline fools

by WikiLeaks

to prevent it from leaking

what WikiLeaks is about to leak.

***

A Baader-Meinhoff Day For Libel Laws

JUDGE: Are you now, or have you ever been,

a blogger?

KASCHKE: Yes. But if you repeat that I will

sue you for libel.

***

link: Baader-Meinhoff Day

*

I.T. - Rest In Despair

The picture shows quite clearly that there were

no policemen in sight

when the man tripped over.

***

And For My Next Trick...

I want everyone to think of laws that should be repealed.

I'll start.

David Laws.

***

Lock 'Em Up & Give 'Em The Key

Fewer criminals will go to prison: we'll put them in Harriett Harman's Equalities Office Peace Pod instead.

***

Scotland The Brave

Frankly, my ex-cleaner deserves to go to jail - she never polished the silver properly

and always served the Champagne

from the wrong side.

***

link:  Loloahi Tapui

*

Human Rights

I sentence you to be taken from here to a

place of execution

where you will execute

as many innocent civilians as you can

whilst blowing yourself up.

***

As The Crow Flies

Our database is complete and up-to-date.

It's just that some people don't realise

that they are members of the RMT

or that they work on the railways.

***

His Latest Rendition...

The use of a strategically placed banana

does NOT constitute

torture under British Law.

***

Out Of The Woods...

OK, Elin, you're not my caddy,

you don't want to be my caddy,

and I do know where to stick that

golf club

you're weilding.

***

Putting UK First

The Americans have undertaken not to put

McKinnon

in a supermax prison.

They'll put him in

Guantanamo

instead.

***

link:  UK First

*

The Postman Always Rings Twice 2

You know me - I'm a man of tradition.

And we traditionally

kow-tow

to the United States

***

link:  The Postman Delivers

*